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ACT With Confidence

Guiding Questions: Do you ever struggle with confidence? What comes first - confidence or action?


Confidence can either make you feel like a superhero or feel like you are stuck in a pit. Confidence is the belief that you have what it takes to do something. When we have confidence, we put ourselves out there and take risks, bounce back from setbacks, and attract people and opportunities.


A lack of confidence keeps us from doing what we want and becoming who we want.


How can we increase our confidence so we can become the people we are meant to be and live the lives we are meant to live?


Peak Performance Educator Shade Zahrai says, “Research consistently shows actions lead to more confidence. The actions we take build our skills or competence, which boosts our self-efficacy and self-belief and fuels our confidence to propel us to take more action.”



The confidence we seek is built on the steps and actions we take.


In her TEDx Talk titled Six Behaviors to Increase Your Confidence, Emily Jaenson says if we want to get people to change, we should start by changing behaviors because when people see themselves behaving differently, they will start thinking and acting differently.



If we want to feel confident, we need to change our actions and behaviors and start acting like we have confidence.


In her TEDx Talk, Emily gave 6 behaviors that help you build your confidence:


1 - COUNT YOURSELF IN


Countdown from 3 or 5 and then act. Counting can get you started, and the momentum will keep you going. When you feel nervous or scared, imagine the clock is running out, say in your mind, “5, 4, 3, 2, 1, go!” then do what you need to do before you give yourself a chance to back out.


2 - 20 SECONDS OF COURAGE


Can you be brave or have courage for 20 seconds? Commit to 20 seconds of action, then keep the momentum going.


3 - TAKE YOUR SEAT AT THE TABLE


Put yourself out there and go for it. Imagine there is a table of people who are all doing what you want to do and living how you want to live, and they are waiting for you to take your seat at the table. Don’t sit around the table watching everyone else take their seat - take your seat and speak up.


4 - CHEER FOR OTHER PEOPLE’S SUCCESS


Confident people celebrate the success of others rather than feeling threatened. Don’t pull people down the ladder when they are climbing, and don’t pull the ladder up behind you. Help people up the ladder by supporting them and celebrating their growth and wins. Wins are so much better when they are celebrated together - join in and cheer someone on.


5 - DO MORE OF WHAT YOU ARE GOOD AT


What are you really good at? What is easier today than it was one year ago? What are some of your most proud accomplishments? Those answers are where your confidence is born - confidence is born in what we have already done and achieved. 


Build on what you have already done and what you are good at.


6 - CELEBRATE CONSTANTLY


Don’t just immediately move on without reflecting on your accomplishments. Find ways to meaningfully celebrate your accomplishments; this creates a marker on your brain that helps you rewire and reinforce behaviors that have led to your success.


Emily began her journey of becoming a confident sports executive by asking herself three questions:


1 - Who am I?

2 - Who do I want to become?

3 - How does the person I want to become behave?


She wanted to have a successful career that meant something and allowed her to contribute to something special, but she knew in order to achieve this goal, she would need to start acting with more confidence.


Ask yourself these questions so you can have an image of who you want to become, and when fear paralyzes you, act like you have confidence using one of these 6 tools.


SOMETHING(s) TO THINK ABOUT


1 - What is one area in which you are very confident? How can you leverage this confidence in other areas of your life?


2 - What is one area in which you struggle with your confidence, and how can you leverage one of the 6 behaviors to help you act with more confidence?


3 - Imagine you became the person you knew you were meant to be. What actions do you need to take to become this person?1


For a printable PDF version of this post, click here: ACT with Confidence

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